Little nuggets of Genius.

• Internet relationships are RETARDED. Take this scenario between “BadBoi27” “x_sexygurl_x”. Not many people know this, but the first person to spell Boy, “Boi”, was actually an illiterate retard. The word caught on, and now almost all children with that name are illiterate retards. The first person to use the name “SexyGurl”, who was known as “SexyGurl.1”, was actually a pre-op transsexual. These two sorry individuals met in a chatroom.

BadBoi27: So wasup?

x_sexygurl_x: nm you?

BadBoi27: nm

*5 minutes of uncomfortable silence*

BadBoi27: I been finkin, wud u go out wiv me?

x_sexygurl_x: Sure

BadBoi27: Kewl

*5 more minutes of uncomfortable silence*

BadBoi27: So wasup?

x_sexygurl_x: nm you?

BadBoi27: nm

And that my friends, is the extent of an Internet relationship. BadBoi is obviously a closet homosexual, because no straight man says “Kewl”, and sexygurl is grotesque, because she has been reduced to dating someone over the Internet.

• People who think their music tastes make them better than you are GAY

Gay and insecure. There are so many people like this. Everywhere you go. I used to get so pissed off. Man, maybe I wont be cool if I don’t listen to that music?

Bullshit. Bottom line is, you like what you like, there’s nothing you can do about it. This goes for everything in life. Just be who are you, and people will like you for you.

• Rap music be killin’ motherfuckers

It’s not bad parenting that kills the kids. It not idiotic people with no self-control. It’s not gun manufacturers who make millions off the illegal trade in hand weapons. It’s not the drug dealers and rapists roaming the streets free, because of an under funded, understaffed police force that is capable of killing innocent members of society whom they believe fit the stereotype of a “terrorist”. Rap music is destroying society as we know it. Influencing our extremely susceptible kids who, without the proper surveillance, are going around imitating their favourite rap stars, who subliminally implant the relevant messages so as to rewire 15 years of being taught “right” and “wrongs”, so they go and commit an act of violence in an attempt to rebel.

BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!